Missed

went to an open air jazz concert with my dad and his girfriend. Picnict and had a nice time.
As much as i was into my book, i couldnt help being slightly ingaged by the sounds of the notes...and the aura of the people aouned me. Putting down my book for a couple of moments i allowed the notes to curl arouned me as i slipped into my own private world.
I could think so easily it was as if the whole world was sorted out for me and there was no need to worry and longer. but at the same time came a kind of sadness hard to put into words. a melancholy hapiness....as if the weight was being taken off my shoulders..but i didnt really want it to go. I let the breeze knot my almost- blonde hair...and smiled to myself.
Everything was going to be alright.
The night before, though was a completely different matter.
and do not know why....but at some moments i really do miss Wilkins more and more. and maybe its because he is all i have left of the best year of my life, fourth grade. Its when i discovered writing as more than a hobbie, as a way of expressing ones self...a passion, where i met my best friend of four years , Hanna R., I had the best teacher, wondeful friends, wonderful life.
And i miss him because of this..i wojnt be seeing him. This means everything about waters Landing is gone, memories, faded. and in a couple of years...I wont remember what Wilkins loks like , how he was, the school i loved.
Along with all the friends i loved. and i cried. but you really couldnt call it that. it was such sadness that cant be put into words. I heared a wail, Coming from the core of me, i heared sobs and splutters, and felt the wetness of tears...and it took me a couple secondes to realize it was coming from me.
This is true sadness.